Thursday, February 22, 2018

Sunday, February 4, 2018

These Books are a representation of my best efforts to remember my troubled past.
I have seen a lot and done a lot in my lifetime.
Helping many people along the way.
And Killing those whose time had come.
I do not take pleasure in removing souls from this place, but these were souls that were lead by the Devil himself.
I have no choice in this fight between good and evil, I was marked by God to do his bidding and to carry out death to those who cause injustices to mankind......
  I am Michael
   The Angel of Death

First Draft
Chapter One  Scene Three

Sure could use a drink Michael thought as he looked at his watch.
It wasn't even 10 am and he was already dreaming of his liquid lunch he had most days.
He sat there staring at the computer screen trying to look busy as people walked by carrying arm fulls papers, files.
He could hear chatter from other Detectives answering phones, taking notes, yelling at whoever was on the other end.
Yep, normal day, At the Boise PD, and he still needed a drink.
Michael like to grab a Hot Dog and a Coke from the vendor that set up shop right the front doors of the PD, taking it to his car, down about half the Coke in one swig and fish out the bottle of Idaho Gold from under his seat and fill the Coke back up.
Tossing the Dog into the back floorboard until the next cleaning.
Sometimes he would go to Jakes and sit in the back and down a couple for lunch maybe eat some pretzels.
It all depended on if he wanted company or not.
Not that Jake was much Company because was a damn dog and why Chuck called the place Jakes was anybody's guess.
Michael had gone into this routine because he needed a routine after what happened a couple of years ago.
It was the only thing that kept him sane, one foot in front of another, day after day, week after week.
Maybe things would've been different if his wife would not of left, but he couldn't blame her, nothing was the same after that day... nothing.
Taking another swig of the Coke he leaned back in the seat of his car. closing his eyes he let his mind go over that day, What did he miss? what could he of done differently?...Why his daughter?
Why in Hell haven't they caught them?
No matter what he did, he couldn't keep it from going cold and now the file was locked away in the cold cases.
Taking a drink of the Coke, he slammed the steering wheel, I'll find them, honey, I promise.
He felt the vibration of his pager before he heard it and was already turning it off.
Tossing the Coke out the window, Michael called into the dispatcher.
"WTF, again?"
"Ok, I'm on my way"
Michael started to start up is the car when some guy with a cane whacked the side of his car.
"Hey buddy, you just go around throwing shit out your window?"
Michael looked at him and noticed he was a Vet. and old enough to serviced in Korean or maybe last WWII.
"Shit he said under his breath" and got out of the car.
"Hey I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking"
"At your age, you should do a lot more thinking than sitting in your car beating on the steering wheel," The Vet said
"Your right Just needed to vent" Michael replied
"Son if you had seen what I've seen, you'd need more then to just vent"
The old Vet must have seen Michael's sidearm and Tatoo
He stood there for a minute and said "You a Policeman"
"A Detective" Michael replied
"A Seal also?"
"A long time ago" Michael replied
"I guess maybe you've seen enough to whack a couple of steering wheels," The old Vet said with a grin.
Michael laughed "Yea I have, but not enough to throw a Coke can out the window"
The Vet laugh at that "Son let me tell you something"
"I'm all ears Sir"
"Don't Sir me, I'm an Enlisted man, I work for a living, just like you"
Michael laughed
"Son, don't let life get ya down... There is always tomorrow"
Michael thought for a moment... "I appreciate that and by the way I'm Michael"
"I'm Bill, Michael"
"One more piece of advise Michael"
"Whats that Bill" Michael grinned he was beginning to like the guy
"Always carry mouthwash with you"
Michaelk stared at him for a minute and busted up laughing.
The Old Vet smiled and walked towards the Police Dept.

Friday, February 2, 2018

Idaho Police Officer stricken with a Brain Disorder with no diagnosis.

My name is Shane Gilbert. I live in Idaho where I am 35 years old, a husband, and father of 3 young boys. (5,7,9). I was the main provider for my family and was a Police Officer for 12 years. 
One day about 1.5 years ago at work I began to feel very dizzy like the room was spinning and I also felt like I was having a heart attack. I was rushed to the ER but sent home later that night with a bottle of pills and no answers. From that day forward the dizzy spells would continue happening daily many times a day. My vision would go blurry, the room would spin and I often fell down. 
After many many ER visits, and Doctor visits I was finally referred to a Neurologist. After many tests they found a cyst/mass on my brain. A short two weeks later I went in for brain surgery. And in the blink of an eye my career was gone. 
My only means of supporting my family was gone. Being a police officer my first instinct is to fight. Unfortunately your brain tells every part of your body what to do and how to feel. Mine is broken. It is no longer wired right. My heart wants to do so much for my family but my mind and body won't follow. 
I went from rescuing people in their darkest and scariest days to feeling helpless and hopeless in my own life. Worst of all the surgery didn't work. I still suffer everyday. I try to hide it best I can, I try to act as normal as I can, but deep down I hold a secret. The secret that it's not really ok. And it's not fine. The reason I'm creating this is im still not well. I'm still being pumped full of pills, and even after brain surgery I still don't have answers. 
I'm struggling to keep a roof over my families head and I am needing to get to a University Hospital where there are top notch brain specialists. I just want my life back. My kids want their dad back. I really enjoyed helping people in my 12 years as a Police Officer. Now I'm in need of help. Thank you for your time and God Bless...

Sunday, December 3, 2017


These Books are a representation of my best efforts to remember my troubled past.
I have seen a lot and done a lot in my lifetime.
Helping many people along the way.
And Killing those whose time had come.
I do not take pleasure in removing souls from this place, but these were souls that were lead by the Devil himself.
I have no choice in this fight between good and evil, I was marked by God to do his bidding and to carry out death to those who cause injustices to mankind......
  I am Michael
   The Angel of Death

Rough Draft...

Instinct had kept him alive, tuck and roll had been drilled into him and it saved his life again.
The bullet dinged off a far wall probably about where his head had been before his training kicked in.
shuffling to the side to keep clear of any more bullets...
Well so much for throwing the dogs off he thought but come to think about it where were the dogs?
This must be a lone hunter that is moving separately from the dogs he thought.
He needed to move fast, nightfall would be his best chance of survival but that had to be 6 or so hours away.
Slapping his hands down in frustration Steve thought "What the hell is going on and why me?"
Who is the lost girl that keeps popping up in my mind, what does she have to do with all this?
Steve sat there for a few minutes, trying to put together a plan.
A slight breeze comes into the cave as the entry darkened.
He thought now what?
The Cave was only about 4 foot high and 6 to 7 feet wide.
So standing was out of the question and for a person with a rifle it would be awkward to try rushing into the cave, they just couldn't swing it up to aim fast enough and it was pitch black in there save for the little light coming from the entry and now even that was dwindling down to nothing.
The floor was moist and Steve remembered the raindrops, somehow water was finding a way into the cave plus the breeze wasn't just coming from the mouth of the cave.
He felt on the other side of his face...maybe there was an opening back there in the darkness, just maybe.
Curious about the darkening, Mac moved close to the mouth of the Cave, making sure to stay in the dark.
The sky was black as hell itself, Thunderstruck close.
yanking his head back, SOB he said, that was close and then he heard them,
The Dogs,
But the dogs were acting strange, not the normal yapping that he heard earlier it had more of an urgency to it.
And then the rain came, not in a normal spitter was like the heavens opened up and dumped hell lose on the land.
Lightning was striking far and close causing the dogs to howl.
The thunder was almost a continual boom that shook the very earth Mac sat on.
Christ, he thought, "I'm glad I'm in here"
Mac moved back into the cave, going farther and farther trying to follow the breeze as he looked for light but that was almost futile with the darken skies outside.
He hadn't got far when he felt more than heard a rumble in the ground.
Dirt fell from the low ceiling, Mac turned and said "Shit" and he scrambled for the entry.
Earthquake or something he figured he would take his chances outside.
Making it back to the entry, he laid flat and inched his way outside onto the ledge...
The dogs were virtually screaming with their yappy and farther away?
They were leaving... why?
Mac saw it, even in the dark you couldn't miss the different tone the river was making, now it sounded like a full on Raging river and he could see it was over the bank and working it's way up to him, "Holy Shit" Mac muttered a ????
Turning he scrambled back into the cave and headed into the back, he had to find the way out, somehow water got in and the breeze came from that also.
There was no way he would survive going into the river now.
And it was inching it's way up to the cave... Soon it would be underwater and he would die in this hole in the ground never knowing why he was there and even who he was...
Mac couldn't let that happened and he moved faster without worry of running into something he wouldn't like...
At this point, he would run right over it.
letting his nose smell the fresh rain scent, Mac moved farther and farther into the cave, the darkness enveloped him to the point that he couldn't even see his hand in front of his face.
The cave kept closing in on him and he was afraid that he would run out of space or get stuck.Finally, he saw a dim beam of light up ahead and with this, he had a new determination, even with the walls now we're down to 20-24in high and about the same width.Water was going down through the hole in the ceiling like a spigot was turned on but Mac was more concerned with the water that was starting to catch up with him from the Cave entry.
Squeezing through the last tight spot into the area below the hole in the ceiling, brought him into a hollowed out cavern, With what light there was he could make out the walls were slick to touch.
Mac's mind was nagging at him, something was wrong.
the area was hollowed out into a 6 to 7foot wide and about the same hight.
He could barely touch the opening in the ceiling.
Bring his hand back as if something bites him, it came to him.
The hole was a crack in a solid rock and it wasn't man size by now means... "Shit," he said
Jerking his head up as he heard a roar from down the crawl space he had just come from, Mac only time for one thought..."It's a Blow Hole"
Mac was thrown up against the back wall as the water came bursting in.
The Cavern filled up in seconds and Mac only had time enough to take a big gulp of air.
The current toss him around for a minute or so until he found an air pocket at the ceiling.
The current pressure equalized in the carven and the water seem to calm some.
The water going out was a lot less then the water coming in, so he just needed to stay away from the blowhole or he could get sucked in and turned into hamburger as thousands of gallons of water tried to blow him out of the hole.
That was only one problem was "Now What?"
Mac knew the air pocket wouldn't last long.
Taking a big breath he dove down to the crawl hole he came from.From what he could tell the flow in wasn't too strong and with any luck, he could swim out the 60-70ft and take his chances in the rapids because there was no chance where he was at.
Going back up to the air hole, Mac could barely get any air from it as it had shrunk to hardly anything.
Taking what he could he dove again and enter the crawl space.
With the way the flow of the water flowed in and out it was throwing him around like a rag doll, grinding him against the sides and ceiling of the small tunnel.
Mac fought the panic he felt being underwater in a closed space.
When he came through he had been in control but underwater and barely slipping through the small spaces was bad enough but he was running out of air.
Popping into the larger chamber from the waters forced return, Mac corkscrewed to an air pocket that lined the ceiling of the cavern.
Gasping for air, all he got was a gulp before the current that was rushing by the entry of the Cave sucked him out into the raging rain gorged river.
It rolled him over and over until Mac didn't know up from down and the last of his air left his lungs.Trying to claw his way to what he thought was up only took him faster down river until the final rollover crashed him into some rocks and rendering him unconscious (Move to when he wakes up)
threw him onto a rock that jutted out from the rock face of the canyon.
Mac gasped from the impact, losing consciences.

Tuesday, November 21, 2017


   These Books are a representation of my best efforts to              remember my troubled past.
I have seen a lot and done a lot in my lifetime.
Helping many people along the way.
And Killing those whose time had come.
I do not take pleasure in removing souls from this place, but these were souls that were lead by the Devil himself.
I have no choice in this fight between good and evil, I was marked by God to do his bidding and to carry out death to those who cause injustices to mankind......
  I am Michael
   The Angel of Death

First Draft

Mac felt the raindrops but didn't register what they were at first,
He was in the water for sure as he could hear the water rushing over rocks as it made its way downstream.
If that was what he was laying in, A stream or river he wasn't sure but the cold of it had entered his body and he shivered.
Bringing his hand up to the pain he felt in his head he noticed how heavy it felt. He moved in slow motion at least that's what it seemed like.
Touching the bruised spot on his forehead brought a sharp jolt to his senses.
Shit, he thought.
Pulling himself up, brought a wave of dizziness and he rolled over and puked.
Finally feeling he had nothing left to vomit, Mac tried again to sit upright.
A wave of dizziness attacked him but he fought it and stayed sitting with his chin on his chest, his head just felt too heavy to hold up for any length of time.
Finally lifting his head after what seemed like hours, Mac tried to focus, even so, there wasn't much to see.
It was pitch Black and mostly all he saw was the stars above.
It was funny how many stars you could see when the light from your surrounding was minimal.
He was laying in a river or I should say a small beach if that's what you'd call it.
The moon was out in force and that helped as his eyes started to focus.
Whatever was given to him was wearing off... but who? Why? he couldn't remember.
Touching his forehead again brought another rush of focus from the pain and he figured maybe a case of amnesia.
He was no Doctor that was for sure but when you have a dent in your forehead as he did and can't remember shit... Well, it doesn't take a genius to figure out, your screwed.
First things first, get the hell out of this stream before something freezes and falls off.
Trying to stand was another obstacle he needed to get out of the way.
Searching around for something to use to steady himself, he found a limb that had broken off at about 5 feet long.
Using that he inched his self up to a standing position and held that until the dizziness stopped.
Standing there he noticed a cliff that overlooked the river, actually as he looked around he noticed that the river through time had cut itself deep into the ground.
The river had been grinding away at the river bed for thousands of years Mac guesses to have sunk itself 10-15 feet down.
Must have been how he ended up laying in the river, falling off the cliff and hitting his head on one these rocks that covered the bank.
Well at least so far he knew how he got there but why was he in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night?
Well, thats the question of the month isn't it Steve? he muttered to himself.
Looking around there was no obvious way back up the cliff and with his head pounding he wasn't about the climb out.
So he started walking downstream, He remembered his father telling him, "Son if you ever get lost, find a stream or river and go downstream because people build by water and you'll run into someone sooner or later"
What troubled Steve is maybe he didn't want to find just anyone.
There had to be a reason he was out here in the middle of the night and for him to fall off a cliff, well he had to have been in a hurry to not see it or hear the river before he fell.
Something just wasn't sitting right with him and the harder he tried to remember the worse his headache got.
He told himself, "Keep moving Mac, Don't Stop"
Noise, he heard noise, stopping Mac craned his head to hear better, "Dogs"
Fuck, not sure why but he just did it.
He stepped back into the cold water and moved faster downstream.
"Dogs, it wasn't just one dog or wolfs or coyotes, no it was Dogs! and they were in a frenzy.
He knew what it meant and something inside told him it wasn't the kind of search party he would want to find him.
Whatever happened to him, was causing his subconsciouses to push him the flight, fighting was out of the question, no weapon, unknown was tracking him, how many? weapons? just too much of unknowns for him to fight without a weapon so the other instinct was flight and that's what he was doing until he could figure out what he was up against.
A thought came to him, searching his pockets came up empty, Shit he was hoping for a billfold, drivers license, anything with his name on it or address.
The dogs were far behind he could barely hear them and only once in awhile. Using the river to keep his scent from the dogs was working but in daylight whoever had the dogs would be able to track him but the unsettled mud along the river.
He needed to be far from them by daylight.
And he needed to find a hidden spot to stay out of sight for the day.
He would lay low until night and push forward until he found people and a cell.
"A Cell" who in the hell was he going to call?
"Stupid" He could call 911 or get a ride into town and get to a Sheriff.
What had been interesting and was weighing on his mind was the empty holster that had been clipped to the inside of his pants in the middle of his back.
For some reason, he knew there had been a Glock 26 in it at one time.
How he knew this he had no idea, but whatever it was, it was pushing him to keep moving with a sense of urgency.
He was missing something, something very important and he needed to figure it out.
The empty holster at least gives him something to check out, was he a mobster, a cop?, a private Eye?.
He wasn't a hunter, not wearing a dirty, wetsuit-like he had on and who hunts with a Glock? no, he was a professional something.
He had to get out of the water his feet were numb with cold.
A fire would be nice but he couldn't risk it and he was sure even if he had matches or a lighter they would've been ruined by the water by now.
The good thing was there were plenty of rocks to walk on to avoid footprints but then dogs don't give a shit about footprints, it was all about scent.
Daylight was finally creeping out from behind the mountain range that Steve couldn't identify.
Finally finding what he needed he broke off a branch.
"Rue" it's purple flowers were the giveaway, How he knew he had no idea but he used it to sweep behind him as he searched for a hiding spot.
Finally, about 10 feet up the side of a high of the cliff was an opening.From where he was standing it looked like he could barely squeeze into it if it had any depth to it.Not much time before he would be a sitting target for someone with binoculars or even a rifle scope.
It was slow going, he seemed to be surer-footed then an amateur, so he figured he had climbed at least once before.
as he pulled his head up over the out hang of the cave, something flew at him.
Mac ducted almost losing his footing, he had to hold tight for a minute to settle his nerves.
And then he slipped.
Sliding all the way to the bottom created a dust cloud and shit lot of noise.
Standing up he dusted off his suit that was threadbare by than, torn and ragged.
There was blood down the front, his wrist was bruised and bloody.
In the light, he could finally look at himself, looked like I was in a war Mac thought
The fog that had enveloped his brain was finally lifting and he could take stock of himself.
Feeling his face he gasped "My face feels like I had landed on my face or someone beat the shit out of me" he thought
Looking up, he saw what had startled him.
A hawk had been sitting there watching for prey and he must have been as startled just as much as Mac.
"A girl" it popped into his head....A girl, a lost girl.
Shit, Mac thought, A girl finally he had something.
He was searching for a lost girl.
So why was he being hunted?
"Good question Mac," he thought.
At least I've got something.
For once he had something smile about.
Knowing he needed rest and to get out of sight he grabbed the "Rue" branch and swept his way back to the cliff, hanging off one of his shoelaces so that is would repel any dog who thought to look up, Mac began to climb.
Grasping the ledge he swung himself over the top.
The ledge was small, 2 foot by 3 foot but big enough for him to settle on it as he checked out the entry to the small cave.
Dark and musty, probably rainwater found ways in.
Picking up a pebble, Mac tossed it in... nothing he picked up another one and threw it even farther, expecting something to jump out at him.
Nothing, well at least if it was large it would've let him know before he went in.
The Sun was starting to beat down on him and he felt he had sat there long enough, So taking another look around, up the canyon from where he came and down.
He saw nothing, heard nothing also which was a good sign...
The hair on the back of his neck stood up a second before rock blew out next to his face, throwing chips and dirt onto him.
Blinded by the dirt, Mac went from memory and dived into the cave, hoping he wasn't diving into the side of the mountain.
Another bullet followed him into the mouth of the cave.